The Hunt For The Perfect Robe

After a long overdue eyebrow wax at Concepts (Sam is a wizard), I sauntered in through the basement of Holts with every intention of hoofing it up to the shoe department. Somewhere along the way, probably a result of repeatedly emailing while walking and not looking where I’m going, I somehow ended up in the mens underwear department. There I remembered a certain filmmaker, Billie Mintz saying he was looking for robe…
After seeing Tom Ford’s directorial debut, A Single Man, did any other straight male turn to his date and say “I’ve got to get myself a robe like that!”? That answer, I will never know, but I figured it wasn’t something he was going to go out and get himself, so I thought I would take a stab at it. Well let me tell you, what was supposed to be an innocent little impulse purchased turned into a multiple-return, seemingly never-ending saga!
My initial thought was to stay away from terry cloth and get something more lounge-y, so I went with a beautifully tailored Holt Renfrew brand robe. I thought it had that same kind of early 60’s “A Single Man” throw back feel.

But it was too big and too much like his dad’s robe (whatever that means). So back I went in search of a “sexier” robe. No, not like a short, red silk robe with flames and dragons on the back, although maybe that might have been cool. There I was, asking three Holt’s salesmen to help me find a sexy silk robe for a man, thinking “What have I gotten myself into here!?” So I exchanged it for this blue one that had a more “masculin” pattern I guess?
Yes, that is a picture of Billie trying on the “sexy silk robe” in the middle of a restaurant.
“No that waiter is totally NOT weirded out dear!”
But I failed. Again. Now he’s saying maybe he wants terry cloth. Fack! This time I drag his ass back to Holt’s so that he can pick out the damn robe himself. The sentiment is clearly gone at this point. And of course, after hmm-ing and haa-ing, he goes with the one I was going to get in the first place. A plaid (of course) Burberry robe that was not too long, not too big, just the right kind of “sexy”. Mission accomplished.
Note to female readers: Buy him a black Hugo Boss scarf for godssake. You can’t go wrong there.
And for the record… Billie was rocking this look at The Innovator’s Ball last April, before A Single Man even came out. Don’t think I didn’t buy him those glasses too.


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